Afternoon dears, and all of that jazz. I’m actually feeling a severe lack of motivation, and am thereby grateful for the fact there’s a song by that name (lyrics) that I rather enjoy, AND find to be most relevant. I’m just sort of listlessly dragging through the days this week, and I find that I can’t bring myself to care one way or the other. 🙂
The last day or two, I’ve been thinking on the whole institute of marriage thing. I, myself, am married, and don’t feel like I had to do it to fit some social or religious norm. I did have to do it to enable myself to stay in this country, but that only is relevant in that it caused us to get it done and over with in short order. This was fine by both of us – the fanciest I could’ve envisioned would have been something incredibly basic outdoors with no pavilion and probably pizza at best. What we got was a lovely little ceremony at the local registry office (which is definitely a step nicer than the JoP jobby in the States!), and down to the pub to chat with our friends for an evening. It was basic, it was simple, and it didn’t mean that we started our joint life up to our ears in debt.
However, I know that I have a lot of friends who do feel that the institute of marriage is some sort of shackle set, that it’s somehow agreeing to do what Deity says, that it’s not fair if gays can’t have it just the same (the government is working on that here, but I think that it’s kind of perilous to try and force churches to change even if some people think that’s what needs doing :P), and so forth. I guess it’s hard for me to understand why people let themselves work under the false premise that they have to have a ceremony (you don’t), that it’s necessarily religious (you don’t have to do that either), and the one that I get the least – people thinking that it’s some magical portal and that somehow your relationship is going to be fundamentally different. Honestly, I just think people get these crazy ideas about what life ‘should’ be like from watching too many movies and TV shows, and don’t realize that it’s normal and healthy to fight, to argue, to not always get along. Or, the one that gets me, that it’s somehow weird spending time with your spouse? My husband is one of my best friends, and we’re always glad to be in each other’s company. And while we’re still new to it all in all (it’ll be our fourth anniversary in July), I am fairly confident that we have the skills needed to keep going for a long time, the skills in question being communication and huggles. *nodnods*
But really, what I think the rambling is trying to say is thus – I think people are so scared to fail that they just don’t want to even try. I’m a ditherer, so I have some mild sympathy for this sort of mindset. But as I sit here watching my daughter chew on a tambourine (gotta love teething!), I smile, and pat myself on the back for being willing to take risks and put my heart on the line. There was a lot of hurt along the way, but all in… it was worth it. Especially since my husband didn’t have to pay a dowry of two cows to get me, hee hee – hooray for not being chattel in modern-day marriages! xD
Anyhoose, enough nonsense for today. Have a good day, if that’s your thing!