HomeUncategorizedMy Turn, I Guess. :s

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My Turn, I Guess. :s — 9 Comments

  1. Labels are fine for comparative purposes, not so much if judgments are attached. Like genres of music are useful to seek out more that you might like to hear, and are hideous things when trying to foist your taste on someone else. Some labels that I’d provide about myself – I’m a scientist, I’m a hugger, I’m a researcher, I’m curious, I’m a communicator, I’m a debater, I’m a meddler, I’m a nurturer, I’m a seeker, I’m challenging, I’m a listener, I’m vulgar, I’m an optimist, I’m a reader, I’m a chocoholic, I’m a cat lover, I’m a giggler and I’m me.

  2. you’re a hard little nut, my neenerbeener. and when i say “hard”, what i very specifically mean is that…you have drawn yourself up so very, very tight that the resultant ball-of-girl is impenetrable. you protect your soft innards from everything – from the outside, from the inside, from loved ones, from strangers, from yourself, from good, and from bad. you do it because you are stricken with horror at the concept of someone thinking you’re asking for help or asking for attention, you’re also disgusted by needing anything – justifiably, i’d say, given your upbringing. you were left to be very self-sufficient. you hate being coddled or guided or helped, but you also know you need it, but you can’t ask for it, and you can only accept it in the most specific of circumstances. you also are honest about things nobody is ever honest about so you come across as harsh, which makes people respond negatively, which breaks your heart and makes you respond negatively, and so on. you also get all pissed off about shit i can’t even fathom and often surprises me, but you also have good reasons for being pissed – they’re just not reasons that would ever, ever come to my mind. i think that likewise, they don’t really come to other people’s minds, and people often don’t bother trying to see that you have valid reasons for being mad, they just mark it as irrational and get butthurt.

    you’re not an angry person. you’re not an unfeeling person. you are a joyous, wonderful, brilliant, soft, loving, sometimes fragile person who can be hurt way more easily than i ever could be, sometimes all it takes is an accidental bump with an elbow. hilariously, it’s taken me until the last few years to figure that last part out. you’re insane, and like all insane people, are INCREDIBLY difficult to deal with – but the payout of your love is so motherfucking worth it. and that’s what i know about you.

    <3

    • You say it better than most, but then, you’ve put up with me longer and more genuinely than almost anyone else we know… hell, probably better than anyone else we know. 🙂 Which is probably why I let you see the fractures more than anyone else, even if they’re petty and stupid. <3<3

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  4. you know – if none of us had fractures, we’d never discover the interesting things that we do when we’re attempting to mend them. Scars are much more of an interesting life story than the bland perfect surface, a record of risks and adventure.

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