Today has been one of those days where yes, there’s been some anxiety jagging, but a cup or two of Tension Tamer have knocked it on its ass. I’ve managed to do some more planning for my NaNoWriMo bid, and really… I’m still just sort of amazed by this. I can’t deny that I’m in an upswing if I’m managing this, and yanno… I’m grateful for it after my shitefest summer.
Having said that, I’m wary of there being a crash. After all, more of my time is spent in depression than in joy. And there’s still that problem where I try to belittle my problems to myself instead of being fully honest with myself about how I’m feeling. There’s people that want to help now, and it does me no good to shove it back in the bag. Though I guess the still-jagging anxiety is going to be worth reporting at my next appointment. I don’t know what to say about focus though. Do I sell any focusing issues I might have short in the hopes of getting something more immediate for anxiety? I don’t know yet when I might be able to get checked for ADD/ADHD, and I know I should ‘tough it out’ until that can be covered. Though my sudden spate of focus makes it harder to know what’s going on. My body and brain, they so do love to confuse me!
I don’t really know right now. I do know that I should enjoy my mug of chamomile, perhaps put the notepad away, and just let my brain sludge out over some Sims. Tomorrow I can plot more, and perhaps spend some time reviewing for my theory test.