Hello tharr!

I know, I missed another day — oh well. There’s not much to report, outside of the continued rise of quasi-anxiety. Like, I’m antsy and twitchy and bored, but there’s no energy behind it. Which is a long-standing annoyance of mine, because people then presume that I’m hyper or full of boundless movement, rather than being like someone electroshocking a dead frog.

Behind that, well… it’s not nice. I can feel my brain wanting to flip out because everything is too the same, even though it hasn’t been lately. I’m not really sure what to do to appease it when it breaks out; there’s nothing I can think of that I could potentially do that wouldn’t wear me out to the point of plunging back into bad depression. Nor am I thinking that adding another thing to the normal routine would be the answer; that would just make the rut of rutting feel even heavier and more crushing.

Anyways, meh. I’ll get through it, and hopefully it will help spur me to be more assertive for myself the next time I see my doctor. I’ve got in mind things I need to ask for, so hopefully I’ll manage to keep hyping myself up for it. I think I can, I think I can, etc.

<3