Frustration Overload
This is more of a question than a ramble — do you guys out there find yourselves so easily overloaded with frustration that you feel the need to lash out? Does it come incredibly easy, the frustration? I feel like I have been a lot better about reining it in and being more reasonable and ‘sane’ (sanity is subjective, ha ha), but it still catches me sometimes. I don’t know whether it’s a bipolar thing, per se, or an ADHD thing (I’m undiagnosed when it comes to ADD/ADHD, but I consider it highly probable that I have it).
I guess a little description of what I’m referring to above is in order. Imagine you’re trying to process some information. You’ve been looking at it off and on for some time, and have never been able to progress on it. It’s something you want to grok, but it’s just not sinking in. You try one thing, you try another, and it somehow becomes so complex that your brain rejects trying to process, and anyone trying to help you gets ripped a new one for trying to push that one last ‘helpful’ nugget of information on you. You know they’re just trying to be friendly and helpful, but because they can’t magically read your thoughts, they have no idea you’ve pushed past the point of things making sense and into the realm of ‘my brain is on fire and is making me stabby’.
This isn’t to say that neurotypical people don’t get frustrated. We all have similar emotional responses to things on a varying scale; that’s why you get those jerks who try to say that we’re all a little bipolar. Certainly, I acknowledge that normal people feel things too. But I would think that their entire brain and body doesn’t clench up and shut down over trying to process simple information. That’s actually one reason why I’d give bipolar some credit for the frustration overload — like many folks with bipolar, my lack of filtering means anything coming at me is face-punching brutal by default.
Anyways, this isn’t just a me thing, is it?
<3
I do get overwhelmingly frustrated when trying to grok something, but it’s never manifested into lashing out at people – it normally ends in tears. If I’m that frustrated, I howl my eyes out. Just to respond to your information request.
Always glad to hear from you. 🙂 I tend to avoid crying myself, if only for the fact that it tends to risk putting me in a very dangerous place in very short order. I guess it’s a lack of control thing. As for lashing out, it’s not an intentional trying to make other people have a bad time; as you’ve probably noticed over the years, it’s more an issue of circumstance, the spillover that I’m unable to contain anymore because (once again, control issues). I’m definitely trying to work on ways to improve my reflexes though! I know there’s a lot of polishing yet to be done.
I am bipolar and add. In this situation I even scare myself!!!
I hear you there. And, I think, I make it worse by knowing the consequences in advance. Rassin’ frassin’… actually caring!
(Caring is awesome, obviously. But damnit if the blowing up doesn’t suck.)
Yes. I find myself out of control an used to be worse than I am now. I have PTSD, anxiety, and depression. Sometimes I felt like my head would explode and my eyes would literally pop out. At my worst I was throwing lawn furniture, screaming at the top of my lungs. It’s normal. Whatever normal is! Goos luck
Thanks, and to you too! I might have chucked a few things in the Dark Days myself. And by that, I mean an ex may or may not have a scar from a Hello Kitty stool lobbed over my shoulder on his forehead. *coughs*
Not being able to filter out things I thought was due to being Asperger’s but you are saying it has to do with being Bipolar? I so relate to all you write. I can’t drive although I can operate a car because too many stimuli coming at me. Really feel handicapped by that!!
Thankfully, I can still drive… though at current it’s like, once every other week during non-rush hours, so there’s less stress (and it’s like, a four mile round trip). As for filtering, my family have often accused me of making things up because I remember details they don’t!
Me, too, same story of what my family used to say.
Sometimes I wonder how any of us managed to find out what was ‘wrong’ with us in those circumstances. I certainly didn’t have that opportunity until I immigrated to the UK to be with my husband!
[WORDPRESS HASHCASH] The poster sent us ‘0 which is not a hashcash value.
Sometimes I wonder how any of us managed to find out what was ‘wrong’ with us in those circumstances. I certainly didn’t have that opportunity until I immigrated to the UK to be with my husband!
Oh, and thank you for following my blog. I am following yours. It is great!