I’ve been having forum thoughts lately. Whether it be that I find one highly recommended by the Bipolaratti, or set up one myself for the network are both options on the table. I always feel most at home online when I have a forum to roost upon, and while I find my fellow bloggers to be a fantastic and supportive community, I still sort of want a place to call ‘home’.

Having said that, I’m not sure I’m up to forums either. I used to be active in the Wheel of Time fandom, but I learned that trying to make that community a safe place for people was just not worth the harassment, threats (to include death threats. I wish I was making that up.) and other such issues. A part of me will always sort of hope it sorts out, but I’ve resigned myself to accepting I will probably never feel safe there. It’s sort of soured me on trying to settle in on other forums, though there’s also the fact that I’ve yet to find anything else that appeals in my interest range — there’s a couple of nice Sims forums, and a great US-UK forum, but I never felt at home in either area.

There’s also the issue of control. I tend to find myself rather quickly elevated to administrative roles because I like helping out a lot — after all, if I’m going to be somewhere, I want to show my love by helping make it a safe and enjoyable environment. And as implied, being able to help out and intercede against drama and danger enables me to fix some control on an environment so that I can feel safe and happy there. It’s not about having The Power™®, or bossing people around — it’s trying to focus my own security needs into something useful for a community as a whole.

But of course, that stuff is hella stressful. It’s one reason I’ve not searched super-hard for potential new forum-based communities. It wasn’t so bad when I was already in horrible physical and mental non-stop fight-or-flight shape, but now I can feel that sort of chemical adrenaline rush a lot more sharply. Do I really want to risk inflicting that on myself again? I know — I’m sure some folk are probably wondering why I can’t just kick back and let other people do things. Trust me, I’ve tried. *laughs* I always end up helping out somehow.

So, do any of you guys have a mental health forum you frequent, like, and consider a sane place to be? Or should I think about setting up one on the network? I’m not totally adverse to running a set of forums, and I’ve had a few people suggest it would be a great addition, and in that, it sways me slightly more towards offering it as a contribution to my fellow Bipolaratti (as I call you guys, hee hee).

I hope that everyone has been having a good weekend.

<3